Sunday 15 January 2012

Steve's Serious Maintenance Tips for 2012

According to the Mayan calendar, the 21st of December 2012 is the date it all comes to an end.  So before our world crumbles, I feel that it’s a good time to think about what myself, and other maintenance professionals should be doing in their last year on Earth.

First up, I wouldn’t prepare any notes about my equipment, explaining what they actually do, where they are, and how much has been spent on them.  I definitely wouldn’t keep track of breakdowns, issues, maintenance, wear, or even tear!

As far as shutdown planning goes, I wouldn’t organise parts, labour or time estimates, especially around tax time.  All I would do, is find a nice comfy couch where I can put my feet up.

If someone asks me to do something this year, I’ll smile and nod (to keep them happy).  But obviously I’ll have no intention of completing their request.  I just want to keep up appearances until December.  Surely there couldn’t be any harm in that?

I think I’ll also start promising my staff great pay rises for 2013, along with a handsome Christmas bonus!  Of course I’ll still need them to work hard throughout the year, and if they do I will guarantee great wealth and prosperity in 2013!  The best part is… there probably won’t be any repercussions for me!

However, there is one caution I must provide you with if you do follow my maintenance tips for 2012.  If those Mayans are wrong, and this whole end of world thing turns out to be a big lie, then you better have a damn good resignation letter ready for December 22nd.